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OPEN MIND OPEN BODY The Yoga of Connection |
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Week 35: Finding a Mentor; Finding Your Own Good This week I want to share to two email questions I received from participants in this class. This first is a question I don't have an immediate answer to, and hope that other members of our community will share their experiences and ideas. In response to last week's email on choosing a mentor: "I have a serious question for you - I have been blessed to have a number of mentors in my life - truly extraordinary women. They live in me (in the case of one who passed), and in the other, who continues to infuse me with joy, discovery, and possibilities. But your email amazed me, because although the women I have emulated have all been powerful, creative, and accomplished, they haven't been particularly successful (or happy) in relationships, and I thought - WOW! but then iIspent some time mentally searching for a woman that I emulate (who is in a healthy relationship that I consider 'role model material') and I could not find one among the people that I know (or even know of). But I now think, based on your e-mail, that if this is something I want (i.e., a partner - and I do want that), then it is important for me to include in my mentoring 'energy' someone who HAS an empowered and mutually expanding situation with a partner. But I don't know where to find that?! I'm an optimist, so this isn't something I come to easily - I would like to have a handful of examples to draw from, but I'm truly stumped! Any suggestions? Do you know of something in mythological literature or Indian legends on which I can draw?" Please share your nominations - and your reflections. http://openmindbody.com/discuss/viewtopic.php?t=142 (login: yoga password: connect) The second email was in response to a guided meditation I shared earlier in the year, A Meditation on Your Own Good. Below is the email and my initial response. I hope those of you who found this meditation challenging, or who have experienced depression, will share your own responses. "I've been busy looking through the older postings & just had a query regarding the Meditation on Own Good...specifically the part where you think of a reason for getting up in the morning. As I suffer from depression, I find this part of the meditation almost impossible to participate in & was wondering if you had any suggestions if I were to teach this to students with depression (that's the reason I'm currently undertaking teacher training). Although I *do* get up in the morning...the only reason is because I can't afford to get fired from my *normal day job* which I don't enjoy anyway. I hope this makes sense - I realize depression is difficult to understand unless you're the one actually experiencing it. Any suggestions would be welcome." My response: I have two thoughts about the meditation.... One is, changing the focus of that part of the meditation to acknowledging yourself for getting up in the morning, despite the challenge and suffering and all of the forces that make you want to *not* get up. Sit with the feeling of gratitude for the part of you who is able to do that (even if it seems like the reason is to not lose your job). The other thing that came to mind is to use the reason "Because I'm breathing." or "Because of this breath." Somehow, you are still connected to life force, even in the middle of depression. That life force expresses itself in you every time you inhale. To accept an inhalation is essentially what it means to get up in the morning. Your reason doesn't have to be a grand reason (to save the world; to create art). It doesn't need a deep positive emotion associated with it. I would be interested in hearing if you find a way to work with this meditation. It is not unusual for part of this meditation to make people cry, when they reach a part that seems missing in their daily lives (whether it's relationships, or service, etc.). It's not often an immediate feel-good meditation, as it asks us to find parts of ourselves that we sometimes feel have died, been abandoned (by ourselves or others), or simply not nourished (by ourselves or others). Respond to this post question online at: http://openmindbody.com/discuss/viewtopic.php?t=62 login: yoga password: connect Visit the class archive and audio materials at: http://www.openmindbody.com/2006emailclass/archive.htm login: yoga password: connect Take care, Kelly
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